How to Deal with ‘Travel Douchebags’
By: Lindsay Hogg
Travelling, you are bound to meet tons of different people of different nationalities. Especially if you are alone and staying in hostels, you make new friends everywhere you go. You meet amazing people who you either have memorable days with and never speak to again, or friends from all over the world you will stay in contact with for the rest of your life. The downside to this is you also come across a variety of douchebags.
A Few Examples of these Douchebags are:
‘The Smart Ass’
That person that seems to think they know everything about you as an individual based on where you are from and the stereotypes from that country.
‘ME, ME, ME’
That special someone who thinks you want to hear their whole life story. Nothing you have to say can be close to as important as how they have come to be in this location and how inspiring their life is.
‘I’ve Been Everywhere’
That person who seems to think they know everything about everywhere because they are well travelled. They are obviously well educated in that country’s politics and culture because they may have spent 2 weeks there 4 years ago. As a result of their infinite knowledge, you should take only their advice and not listen to any media outlets – who are all liars!
How do I deal with these douchebags you ask? Besides ignoring them, which is your most mature and effective choice, here are a few ways to deal:
1. Laugh it Off
If a ‘doucher’ is getting all up in your grill, remember you know better and crack them a smile or quaint giggle. This usually hits harder than telling them where to shove it.
2. Put yourself in their shoes
It is rare that someone is a ‘doucher’ for no apparent reason. There must have been some sort of occurrence or influence in their life that has made them that way. Although this is not an excuse, it may help you to believe they were not born a jerk torturing people since the minute they came out of their mother’s womb.
3. Encourage Them
Can’t get away? Stuck with your ‘doucher’? Might as well entertain yourself by encouraging their behaviour. It makes for a good blog entry after!
4. Make up a New Country
It’s super fun to make up a whole new country and identity. You should come from somewhere quite remote, and have realistic facts. Making your imaginary place realistic works best! Seriously… people ACTUALLY fall for this quite often.
5. Call them out on it!
If you have the guts, this can be the best way to ‘deal’. No need to be confrontational, simply tell them straight up how you feel about their ‘douchiness’.
I like how this follows the ‘How to make friends traveling’ article.
Well put… I always like to use them to further my own means and then abandon them. I’d feel bad about doing that to regular people, but not douchebags… they don’t have souls.
Haha I like this
Remember the Peruvian guy on a retarded yellow bike trying to rip you off by letting you pay to much money for an icecream?
That was the moment I learned the word ‘douchebag’. And ‘The Penisgame’. But let’s not talk about that one..
Douchebag, forever in my vocabulary.
You make me so proud when you use the words I have taught you.
Know-it-alls are such a pain in the ass. Dude – you don’t KNOW a country from being there a couple weeks. Or hell, a couple months. Arrggggggg-
I’ll definitely call them out on it if they won’t stop or it’s all BS. Especially when they’re blabbing on and on in a hostel, trying to tell everyone the same story over and over again.
I love the make up a new country idea, trying it on the next douche.
Nice! Thx for exposing traveling douches for what they are. You rock!
haha thanks Tran!
Numbers 3 and 4 are hilarious! I’ll have to try one of them the next time I run into one of these types, especially making up a country… that is brilliant. 🙂
Nice! I hate Bouche dags (My version of Douche bags) who are not only annoying but LOUD!! They can’t get their point across loud enough, I guess in their desperation to make certain that you hear their yammering they take it up a few more decibels for good measure. Now what will be priceless is when that Bouche takes over the conversation when you go into your discussion of your made up country and proceeds to try to tell YOU all about it. Score! The jury is still out on whether some of them are born that way….one thing is certain….some have had years of practice!
HAHAHAHA!!! Oh I know, I have actually experienced them telling me about my own made up country, because they would obviously know more!
why does traveling attract these people?!?! arrrrrrgh, i find a great way to deal with them is scream in their face “shut up you idiot” 😛
haha someones got a case of the douchebag blues I see!!!
Been travelling for years and I really can’t remember anyone I could apply that label to. I guess I’ve been lucky. Or spotted them a mile away and kept clear.
That is impressive Jim! Show me your ways! haha…
I knew you wouldn’t disappoint with this article. Especially with all your forms of douchebag. I think “doucher” is my favorite.
I think the biggest doucher I came across was a guy who was sitting next to me in a travel agency as I waited for a transfer. He tried telling me that I do it wrong and am spending more money by booking online in advance. Something about walking around hotel to hotel finding and negotiating a cheaper rate is easier and cheaper and it only takes him 30 minutes to get a handle on the city. He wasn’t getting the point that I just didn’t care and would prefer to have those 30 minutes (which I think would be more like an hour or more) enjoying myself. He then added the one line that instantly makes any argument pointless to me “I’ve traveled all over the world and done this”
hahaha yeah I’ve met people like that. Or those who will argue for hours over $5… I would rather have that hour of my life than that $5 off haha
I always revert to the rule of “If this costs/saves more than I would earn in a comparable amount of time at home” If it costs more than that for a similar period of time, I begin to question its worth. If it saves me less for a similar period of time, I also begin to question its worth.
Yeah, that’s a great way to look at it. I was a cigarette mooche at the time of writing this and had to vent