Guest Post Author: The Fantastic Rease
www.travelated.com
@TravelatedRease
I know travelling is supposed to be all about being free, doing what you want and accepting others. I get that. But here’s the thing people, I am not that nice. I realize this is probably the first thing most of you are reading by me and I am not making an awesome first impression, but hey, I am snarky, sarcastic and I have a sassy, dirty mouth. That’s probably why Hogga likes me in the first place. I could have written something a little nicer for my guest post, but what’s funny about nice? I write for laughs. And tips, if you’ve got them.
So without further ado my fellow travelers, here are 5 things I am totally judging you on.
- Your expensive travel gear – I understand that some travel items are expensive but worth it. I also understand that some people are just brand loyal and want what they want, but that is not going to stop me for mocking you for things I think are stupid. For example, people that buy matching name brand everything. Do you really need an REI clothesline? I don’t think so.
- Your snotty minimalist attitude – Listen, if you want to carry only 3 changes of clothes and a bar of soap, more power to you. Just keep your ideals up out of my face. I’m not an over packer, but I am the kind of person who packs 3 pairs of underwear for 1 night, just in case. When you sit on a wet bench, tear the elastic band on your 2nd pair and then fall into a mud puddle all in one day we will see whose ideals come out on top!
- Your budget– I have seen both sides of this. Either people have way too much money to start off with and just blow it on anything and everything or they scrimp so much they never do anything. Either way, it’s annoying. Get an excel sheet and learn how to make a budget.
- Your hookups – I know Hogga will like this one. I am totally judging you on how many times you hook up, where you do it and who you are hooking up with. You think you are slipping past my rating system and mocking? Nope, not happening. I am not saying you shouldn’t hook up with people while you travel, I just think sometimes if I were to video tape your choices, you’d understand my judgment and mocking.
- Your blog – If you are a traveler and don’t have a blog, that’s cool. It’s the travel bloggers I am judging. Let’s be honest, someone can be cool in person and have a terrible blog. If people send me links, especially if I have met them in person, I am going to give your blog a chance. I’m not saying I am a master blogger, I assume people mock my blog as well – I am just openly telling you right now – I am reading and judging. Deal with it.
42 Comments
Hehe, I chuckled at a few of these. Particularly snooty minimalists. They shit me so.
I also dislike the people with many hook-ups, but I’m relatively certain it’s because I’m not lucky enough to be one of them >_>
Haha, aw, I am sure you could get more action on the road. Find a minimalist and tell them that you are SO minimalistic that you don´t even travel with underwear!
Underwear are over rated anyways…
LIES! You can NEVER have too much underwear. I pack one pair for every night I’m on the road, plus 3 extras just in case. I’d pack more, but that wouldn’t leave enough room for my assless chaps.
Sir. Yes, sir! COMMANDO all the way, sir!
It drives me bananas when people claim to be seasoned travelers, you then get confirmation on this fact, and then they have absolutely no concept of money – not in the sense that they blow it, but they can’t budget to save their lives. I traveled with a couple that cheaped out on EVERYTHING but then blew 70 pounds on dinner at TGI Fridays in London. Seriously? You’re in London and your big night out is an American chain? Ugh…
TGIFridays is GARBAGE. I would punch someone in their mouth full of overpriced trash food if they tried to justify TGIFridays to me in the US, much less in London! That is a terrible budget choice.
I like all food!
Wow, that’s pretty judgmental 🙂
The only type of traveler which annoys me are the ones who think they are “changing the world” by traveling. Traveling benefits you, not the other way around.
p.s. I’m a minimalist. But that’s only because I hate carry so much shit around.
Oh, Mr. McJudgyroy! Travel does change the world *because* it changes you. Hopefully you make some friends when you go places (I know you know this as a Couchsurfer). Maybe, if you’re lucky, you’ll make a good impression on someone who might otherwise think that all folks of your nationality don’t know their arses from their elbows. But even if it only changes you, you go back home changed. And that changes the folks around you.
I have to agree with Rease about snotty minimalists. I love the idea of not needing a bunch of crap, but I prefer to be prepared. That said, it’s really the “snotty” part that bothers me more than anything.
Ok Katrina if you’re gonna go all “butterfly effect” on me, then everyone changes the world in their own way 😉
I’m with you on being anti-snooty. To each his own. I love being a minimalist. But I also love friends who have lots of bling (and share!)
Oh snap! I try to be somewhat minimalist… but I always end up with way too much crap because I’m a closet hoarder…
I also hate travelers who think they are changing the world JUST by traveling. However, if they are diong awesome volunteer work along the way or something, that’s totally different.
I don’t hate you for being a minimalist, as long as you don’t try to push that attitude on me. However, I will judge you for wearing overly smelly clothes.
Sorry. It was all that curry. Couldn’t help myself… 😉
Can there be a number 6? Please let there be a number 6!
Okay, if you’ll allow a number 6, it would be people trying to “outcheap” one another. (Alright, maybe even making it a sub-point to number 3…). Comparing how much they spent in blah blah country or how much they squandered for laundry or eats or whatever. It sometimes makes me feel like I am on a reality TV show of competitive budget travel…where I am obviously in the background just judging the crap out of every single contestant.
Hahaha, yes! I definitely would put that under #3 as something I totally judge you on.
I totally agree! I hate the ‘outcheaping’ backpacker, I saved hard to travel and I’m damn well going to do it my way and not compare to everybody else. Plus I hate dorms and refuse to stay in them so I will never be the cheapest traveller out there, but I may well be the one that had the best night’s sleep 🙂
Yes I feel the same way… especially since my most recent expedition was spent with a couple that embodied this mantra. If I bought a sandwich for 3 euros, they would’ve got a better one for 2 euros. Of course I would never find this magical cheap shop, but it was more of a competition than about the saving. When budgeting, they would include things we had reserved as being paid for, so it looked as if they had paid less for the trip than we did. Needless to say after day 2 out of 25, I was ready to strangle them…
I would buy an expensive sandwich and make obnoxious noises while eating it in front of them.
MY GOD THIS IS A DELICIOUS 3 EURO SANDWICH. IT IS LIKE MONEY REINCARNATED AS HEAVEN IN MY MOUTH!
And so on.
I’m “judgy” of the ones who travel for two weeks and are trying to “find themselves”. Please — two weeks is not enough time to grow your fingernails.
That’s the American vacation mentality. Work 50 weeks and spend 2 doing what you want.
I am glad I found someone in Buenos Aires to judge people with 🙂
My judgement knows no borders. I do enjoy company when passing judgement though. I need people to enjoy my wit, sarcasm and intense burns.
And if I have to hear one more time that my trip isn’t “good” or that the way they travel is “the only proper way to get to know a place” or the variety of other “I am better than you crap,” I think I am going to sick you and Hogga on them for a head bashing session!
Hogga and I would be excellent head bashers indeed.
You know what I don’t like — people who get all Travel Elitist. Drives. Me. Bonkers. Love this post!
I named these people in a different post I wrote called “10 Types of Travelers We All Hate”
More judgement, right here: http://travelated.com/10-types-of-travelers-we-all-hate
Totally understand about the hookups! I regret 32.15% of them. You should see my vast collection of tapes I have from my travels…wait, I don’t think I should’ve said that. 😉
(the .15% is because i might be drunk again while i watch them)
Judging you right now. Just saying.
I need to be judged. Thx.
I wish I could thumbs up this conversation…
All I can say is that I’m glad I’m on your good side. Or at least I think I am. The super budgeters annoy me too. I stick to a pretty good budget at home, but when I travel I actually want to experience things instead of constantly worrying about money.
You are on my good side, Christy! I keep track of my money while I travel (and every other day of my life) but I definitely let loose a lot more when I am travelling. At home I am all about boozing at home, but what the hell is the fun of always sitting in your hostel to drink while you travel? Also, I am all about dropping cash on adventures. I watch what I spent while I am at home so I can save to travel!
Muahaha! Oh, I’m judging too. And I’m the type of person who packs FOUR pairs of underwear for one night, just in case. When you sit on a wet bench, tear the elastic band on your 2nd pair and then fall into a mud puddle… then you still might get your period. Is all I’m sayin’.
Exactly! I need backup underwear! I´d rather have extras than have an underwear emergency.
Oh I miss you so much!
Ayngelina, Buenos Aires has never been the same without you. Getting wine drunk and people watching with you was the best. Especially when you would get drunk and loudly hit on the waiter or mock people.
We must meet up somewhere!
Like you, I shared a list of travel confessions I have and one of them was judging. Granted, I wasn’t as specific on these as you were but I like your reasons. As someone who has a budget travel blog, I have to agree with you on the budget thing – people need to learn how to budget and understand what being on a budget is all about.
As for the travel gear, not something I would ever have to worry about. I have some REI clothes that I wear – and they are all 7 years old or older! 🙂 Like you, I don’t care about the gear – just the traveling and feeling comfortable with whatever you wear.
Hookups and minimalist – I could care less about hookups. And I judge people for that as well. However, I am old enough I don’t have to deal with that crap that much. As for minimalist, I do pack light but have found that I also over pack (but underwear is so small, who cares how much you pack!). I tend to judge the other way – if people over pack and look ridiculous carrying around heavy luggage for no reasons.
As for the blog, go easy on me! 🙂
When I studied abroad for my first time, there was a rich girl who brought an entire suitcase full of shoes.
I judged the shit out of her and laughed mercilessly when she got super drunk and left her wallet with $500 USD in it at the bar.
I’m going to add another one! Female travelers who try to get local men/male travelers to pay for as much as possible while traveling. I’m sorry but having a vagina doesn’t entitle you a discount. Go get an ISIC card.
hahaha. No vagina discount? Come on! Kidding, I agree, it´s just sad to watch.